The Snowpocalypse

Bolivar has been hit with a monumental event. This storm has been named the Snowpocalypse. We present to you two views on this historical happening.

Chelsea: This is quite something! Southwest Baptist University has cancelled classes for not one, but two days. It has been quite a while since SBU has cancelled classes. I've heard it has been 23 years since SBU cancelled classes, but I think it's probably more like 1100 A.D the last time school was cancelled. Yes, SBU was around then. Even though SBU cancelled classes, they did still feed us. Thus, most of my dorm trekked the half-mile to Mellers. I know half a mile doesn't sound like much, but remember we were in blizzard conditions! I couldn't see the nose on my face. The other dorms complained, but they just don't understand what Memorial goes through.
The second way we know this truly is an event to go down in the books is Wal-Mart. I went to Wal-mart last night to fufill a want, nay a need for chocolate milk. There I saw simply shocking scenes (nice alliteration huh?). Wal-mart was out of bread. Really, I think there were 3 loaves of bread left. As I continued to the back of the store where they keep the milk,just so I have to pass the valentines aisle and think about how I will have only my cats to spend Single Awareness day with in the future. Anyway, there was also no milk. Well, there was milk or I would have been very sad. There were very few gallons of milk left and no half gallons at all. Wal-mart was out of basic foods-it's a rather scary thing.
Lastly, The National Guard was called in. That is a state of emergency.
There you have it- 2 proofs of just how scary this thing is.

Keisha: The professors here tried to scare me the first few days of classes. Four out of six have it stated in the syllabus that the only reason for cancelling class is a power outage. Today and tomorrow classes are cancelled, and as I sit in Chelsea's dorm room typing this blog, the lights are on and we're watching Glee, so obviously the campus is not without power.
There is a bit of snow here, but I'm not sure what the big deal is. People seem so impressed by how much snow there is in Bolivar, and yes, 11 inches is quite a bit, but really? I'm used to this kind of snow. In Trenton, Mo (where I've lived for the past few years), there was already a foot of snow on the ground before this round of snow storms. My old college didn't even cancel classes today. I find this all very odd. It amuses me how snow freaks out people who aren't used to it. Bolivar has actually declared a state of emergency and has contacted the National Guard. The people of Trenton just call their neighbors who own the tractor to blade out their driveways. It's a strange thing.
The real measuring stick of how crazy people are acting around here is Wal-Mart. I went yesterday, and there was actually a line of people waiting for carts. I have never in my life seen people at Wal-Mart waiting for carts. A lot of the food stuff, such as bread, milk, and Ramen, were gone. The check out lines were pretty long too. The lady at the jewelry counter was the one who rang up my purchases.
So in summary, it snowed here, people are going crazy, I don't understand it. I would like to close by saying, "Ha ha professors. Your syllabuses are incorrect."

The Greeks: Brilliant or just Depressed?

The idea of this blog is more to provide two different viewpoints on issues, mostly relating to literature or the happenings in our lives. That said, the conversation that this post is based off of, we feel, was too good to pass up. Enjoy.

While on a decently long car ride last week without a working radio, Keisha and Chelsea began to discuss Literature. As is the case with many conversations between us, it began with Hamlet. Keisha remarked that Hamlet has some funny bits, despite being a tragedy, whereas Greek Tragedy is just depressing and dramatic throughout. It was quickly decided the Ancient Greeks were emo. For those who haven't been in High School lately, emo is short for emotional and is the less extreme version of being goth. If you don't know what that is, go make friends with a high-schooler who is dressed in black.  We now present our proofs for why the Greeks were emo.

 Have you ever read Greek Tragedy? 
Things go from bad to worse to "is that even possible? " Poisoned dresses, children murdered by their mothers, finding out your wife is your mother and your children are your siblings and gouging your eyes out. It doesn't get much worse and those are only 2 plays. I would read more of them, but my therapist advises against it.


Togas
The real reason the Greeks wore togas was to show off their cut marks. The further up your arms and the deeper the cuts were showed how truly emo you were. The more emo you were, the higher in rank. Sleeveless togas worked perfectly to show off your cuts. Perhaps the artsy ones even made designs. Silly artists always wanting to show off. They took suffering for your art to an extreme.

Statues
This is exactly why the statues we find from ancient Greece have no arms. The decedents of the ancient Greeks became ashamed of their ancestors. They didn't want anyone to find the statures, complete with the cut marks. So they broke the arms off all of the statues. Somewhere, there is an ancient garbage dump full of nothing but marble arms complete with cut marks.

So there you have it. The Ancient Greeks were, without a doubt, emo. 
I believe in the same car ride, we gave Hamlet a happy ending, but I believe we will defer that to another blog post.